The following (except the famous motivational sorry in the beginning) is the brainwork of one John Ellis, used with permission.
“A little motivational story to help everyone get some perspective. A storm washed thousands of starfish on the shore, and one lone man was walking along, picking one up here or there, and throwing it back into the water. A little girl asked him why he did that, since there were so many, and he could not save them all – it just didn’t matter. He wisely replies – it matters to the one’s I save.
But you see, starfish live to open and eat oysters. So every one he threw back caused the death of a child of an oyster fisherman from starvation, as well as the death of thousands of oysters. Back in the day, oyster fishermen used to catch starfish, cut them up, and throw them back into the water. They did not realize every piece then grew another starfish, so their hard work was totally counterproductive.
The point is this – is God an oyster, or is God a starfish? Are you feeling lucky, punk?
/ No one hires me to speak to grade school students anymore, either.”
I wish I had this kind of wit. I occasionally produce gems of witty humor, but John pulls it off basically every time he types a message.